The routines, doubts, and small victories that keep me writing
I’ll admit it: the past two years of writing have been hard. The constant thinking, the pressure to create something new every week, and the quiet tug-of-war between nonfiction and my urge to write fiction, it all adds up.
I’m at a point where I sometimes want to give up nonfiction altogether. Not many people seem interested in it, and most days it feels like I’m still writing only for myself. But then again, maybe I still am.
And yet, I want to write for others too. I want my words to land somewhere. There are days when I’m convinced that no one reads my work. But then one reader leaves a comment or sends a message, and suddenly the whole thing feels worth it again.
I try not to compare myself to other Substack or Medium writers, but I’m human. I get envious. I see their following and wonder if they’re simply reaching the audience they aimed for, while I never really had a target at all. I write simply to write. Maybe that’s a flawed strategy, but it’s the only one I know right now.
I’ve also been searching for a mentor, someone I can ask what to do, what not to do, how to grow, how to refine, but no luck so far. I’ve never known a writer personally. I’ve never met one outside of book signings. I’ve tried talking to authors at events, but of course they have an entire audience to attend to. I’m not special. I understand that.
Still, I keep grinding. Writing every day is the only way I know to improve. Reading and research help too, so I’ve built a routine around them.
Every morning, as soon as I sit at my desk, I open Adobe Reader and read at least 30 pages. My daily loadout never changes: one fiction book, one nonfiction book, a newsletter, The Daily Stoic, and The Daily Laws.
Then I start writing. There’s something grounding about beginning the day with coffee and a stack of different voices. It opens my mind. And crossing those tasks off my list makes me feel like I’ve already won the morning.
What works for me is simple: I take notes on everything. If a line moves me, I highlight it or copy it. If a passage sticks, I save it. There’s always a reason something resonates, so I make sure I can return to it later.
Each morning, after reading, I revisit those notes. Sometimes they become the seeds of an essay, an article, or a newsletter.
Every week, without fail for the past two years, I start a new piece and publish something. I take pride in that consistency. Whatever I create, I edit it, post it, and move on. I never look back. I don’t check how well a piece performed. But I do make it a priority to appreciate the people who follow my work. I respond to comments as soon as I can.
I only have about sixty subscribers, but that’s still a room of sixty people.
I haven’t made much money from writing, but I’m fulfilling a promise I made to myself. And my promise to you is this: I will always stay genuine and true, with all my heart and effort.
I Invite you to read some of my work for The Nightshift Journal, an independent publication I started.
Find it here: The Nightshift Journal
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