“The reason people get good ideas in the shower is because it’s the only time during the day when most people are away from screens long enough to think clearly. The lesson is not to take more showers, but rather to make more time to think “– James Clear
Over the past few years, I’ve carved out moments for mental disconnection from the daily grind. One strategy I’ve found effective is when I’m on commute during this time I am free from any responsibility the only thing I have is that brief moment to conjure up ideas for my next article or so, although occasionally, inspiration strikes while I’m writing down thoughts in coffee shops. What’s truly fascinating is how creativity often surges during the quiet hours of graveyard shifts, around 2 or 3 in the morning.
Reflecting on my previous works, I’ve come to appreciate the ebb and flow of motivation and inspiration. While there were periods fueled by sheer drive, there were equally challenging times when motivation seemed elusive. During these moments, when faced with a blank screen and the clock ticking away, discipline and practice become allies. Though words are hard to find, and ideas seem distant, the task remains: to write. These instances reveal the importance of perseverance and commitment to the craft.
Alternatively, when minds are clear and idle, a lot of thoughts come flooding it this is good but not all the time, I have had trouble sleeping not because I’m not tired trust me I’m always exhausted, but because I’ve had trouble powering down, it seemed like the more I try to relax, do nothing and just close my eyes, my brain goes all over the place.
The silence had become too deafening, so when I sleep, I have the lights on and the TV running, I find this weirdly comforting, this is how I sleep nowadays.
“Inspiration is merely the reward for working every day.”- Charles Baudelaire
I wrote a lot in the beginning, not because I was already a good writer, I didn’t even own a computer before, I would write using the desktop at my work cubicle, I would almost swear that I was immediately good at writing but only because I had a lot of ideas to talk about, and I have read some of my earlier pieces, to be honest, they definitely need work , but hey what’s done is done. I would want to go back and edit some of it but I also read back then that my job is to create work not to criticize my work, I was really good at this only because at that time I was proud enough that I have created and produced something out of nothing, I was excited that my ideas are not floating away into oblivion but rather tangible, now I can actually read my work and somewhat share it to others, if it happens one day.
Nowadays writing seems harder compared to when I first started, unlike some certain tasks, one should be getting better at their craft as they do more and more of it. Ideas don’t come more often, and writing seems harder, maybe I’ve used up all my vaulted ideas, or maybe I was not as inspired as before or maybe I am not as passionate as I thought , there could be a lot of reasons but here I am still, I have written before, that motivation and inspiration is great to take advantage of when its available but real dedication and craft comes with the practice and daily routines that we created for ourselves to complete the task on hand, if we ever wonder how a sushi chef creates a perfectly shaped nigiri, it’s not because he was talented and good at mimicking others work, but because he probably did the same nigiri for a couple of hundred times already.
“We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with”– Jim Rohn
The people we surround ourselves with, will undoubtedly influence us significantly, shaping our thoughts, behaviors, and perspectives, but isn’t it also true that we are the average of the five things we do the most, our actions also a crucial role in defining who we are. The things we consistently do reflect our habits, priorities, and values, ultimately contributing to our overall character and identity.
Having said that, rather than looking at the external reasons for a person’s design, I would like to look at the intrinsic composition of our individuality.
Other than the average of our friends and interests, our life experiences bear out the composition of our mold, not to mention the habits we develop that sometimes lean on the environment that we put ourselves in.
A freshman falls into a friend group that practically undoes the influence of the previous half decade of his high school mates. A boxer goes into a training camp with one set of habits and by the end of his 3-month campaign comes home with new ones. A teenager was never much for exercise, until he started crushing on a girl who is.
Do not be afraid to be lumped in with people though, you can learn from everybody and be worried not that your sense of individuality will be lost. As we mature our sense of individuality just strengthen and it will be harder and harder to find groups and or friends that will share interests with us, do not forget to have your passion blossom as you go through life as well, it will surely help you find time to detach from the world you are involved in, where only you and your thoughts are ever present.
It’s essential to be mindful of both the company we keep and the activities we engage in regularly, as they both contribute to shaping our lives.
My question for you is; would you rather be looked at as the average of the people you interact with or the average of all the things you do individually.
“Be ruthless to things that don’t matter” – Ryan Holiday
Getting good at saying “No” isn’t easy. It’s tough to turn down invites, ignore requests, and avoid doing what everyone else is doing, what’s even tougher is saying no to emotions that eat up a lot of time, like anger, excitement, distraction, obsession, and lust. On their own, these feelings might not seem like a big deal, but if you let them take over, they become just as demanding as any other commitment. If you’re not careful, these emotions can take over your life completely.
“No, I just can’t right now.” may hurt some feelings trust me I know, and this includes my own. It may turn people off. It may take some hard work, But the more you say no to the things that don’t matter, the more you can say yes to the things that do.
No, I can’t go to the party – because I will spend time with my family tonight.
No, I can’t go camping over the weekend – because I have workouts to complete, so I don’t cut my streak.
In some cases, we say yes…
Yes, let’s drink later means No to a video game night with my online friends
Yes, I’ll party with you guys, means skipping the martial arts class at 730 pm.
Yes, let’s train hard on legs later means no to a scheduled rest day today.
One day these types of dilemmas you’ve created for yourself will make you realize what is really important, choices will be made for the good or bad and you will slowly turn into something else if you let these choices consume you, be reminded that our lives consists of daily minute choices, do not be scared though, because you will learn a lot of things, you will learn to see what really isn’t that important that some of it are just distractions. My choices 3-5 years ago were totally different if I’d have to choose now, however those choices are what made me who I am right now. I might have made some bad decisions but I’m sure as hell that those choices looked right in my eyes back then, that’s why I chose them.
“Who are you?”
How often are we asked a simple question like “Who are you?” – for some this might have been the hardest question they have ever tried to answer, I have attempted to answer this thoroughly honestly and wholeheartedly but always come up with an incomplete answer, maybe because I came up with answers that did not really satisfy me.
If we really wanted to answer this question, we must only be truthful, but even then, the societal norms that surround us will prevent us from being genuine and even after that the morality that comes from within us would not be able to answer this question.
I want to become educated but a part of me wants me to be more intelligent compared to others, to be good at my martial to foster discipline and build resilience but also to beat up everyone in my training academy, I work out to create healthy habits and overall wellness but also to look good and have an aesthetic physique, I train hard to create a capable body but also to be stronger than most so I could overpower them. I dress well so I feel good, look clean and neat but also, to look pleasing for everyone, some of these things are nice to look at but behind that has somewhat nasty thoughts with it.
Some of us are freaks, who are you is a question that embodies everything that makes us who we are, our deepest desires, kinks, secrets, likes, dislikes and the ideas that make up our societal mask what we stand for and what we are against, the traumas that we endured the bad things we have done and the good things we did for the others.
“What do you do?”
Will you respond and explain what your career is, will you be defined by what your job is or will you respond with your real aspirations. Is money our real motivation? Then why are we settling for a job, if money is our real goal, then wouldn’t you be working for yourself not for other people? If high status is what we’re really aiming for then why do we work for someone else, shouldn’t we be creating our own empire?
Our identities are ever evolving, Identity is not static; it evolves over time as people grow, learn, and experience new things. What might be true about someone today could change tomorrow, making it challenging to provide a definitive answer to the question. Many individuals may not have fully explored or understood their own identity. They might struggle to articulate who they are because they haven’t reflected deeply on their values, desires, and experiences.
But gun to their head, most people couldn’t give much in the way of a substantive answer. Could you? Have you taken the time to get clarity about who you are and what you stand for? Or are you too busy chasing unimportant things, mimicking the wrong influences, and following disappointing or unfulfilling or nonexistent paths?
XERGIUS 