Not much has happened in life lately, nothing impressive, nothing out of the ordinary. I always try to be productive every day to chase dreams, in my head anyways, but also, I have learned how to “self-care” from years of research, reading and writing. I have been sleeping and eating very well, my skin care is up there and so is my hair care. Though life is beautiful right now, actually always, there were times I have felt empty inside more often than not. So, I wanted to look deeper into this and have started reading into some arguments about feelings of emptiness, I have learned a lot and would like to share some ideas that really stuck with me.
The dictionary defines, Emptiness as: the quality of lacking meaning or sincerity; meaninglessness.
the quality of having no value or purpose; futility,feelings of loneliness.
Emptiness within
Feelings of emptiness generally refer to a subjective emotional experience usually characterized by a sense of inner void, hollowness, or a lack of fulfillment. It is often described as a feeling of something missing. Generally, feeling empty inside can be associated with a lack of purpose or fulfillment, leading mostly to negative emotions such as sadness, loneliness, or apathy. At some point in our lives you and I have felt or will feel something like this. It affects everybody, anybody, regardless of your status, it does not discriminate nor choose, it just doesn’t.
It is extremely normal for human beings to experience emptiness; it is not an illness rather it is part of our very complex make-up. It is very difficult to identify what emptiness really feels, for human experience can be varied despite feeling the same thing. Feeling empty, trust me it is not a great feeling, I have felt emptiness in my life, maybe I still do but I know I have better things to do than dwell in it, I generally would not want to disregard issues like this but having to deal with it for a long time, I know that this is not a 1 step remedy. It may take longer than just that, how long? I still do not know.
Mikey Musumeci, is a Brazilian jiu jitsu practitioner who holds 12 world titles at black belt in multiple different organizations, at age 27 he is one of the most accomplished grapplers we have in our generation. Mikey shared that having ADHD gave him an advantage in learning his martial art. At the top of his sport at such young age, he later started feeling empty and depressed stating: “Something I’ve learned from having depression is when you’re in that state, nothing makes you feel better – food, money, nothing. The only thing that made me feel better was when I helped people, when I made somebody smile, when I made someone’s day better. That gave me a purpose to keep living.
Emptiness as a Paradox
The more we seek to fill the void within us, the deeper we learn how empty we really are, the paradox lies in the idea that actively trying to fill a sense of emptiness or inner void often leads to a deeper feeling of emptiness. Attempts to find external sources of fulfillment or satisfaction to alleviate our inner emptiness often prove to be ineffective or even increase the feeling of emptiness. Maybe we should look internally rather than attaching ourselves to external desires or motives, contentment maybe found from within us, as well as acceptance and self-reflection.
Emptiness within is bad, but in a different light can become a good human experience
Emptiness can be understood as a Neutral state or experience in life. Neutrality refers to the absence of a situation’s positive or negative effect. When we experience emptiness as a neutral state it can be viewed as openness that allows for potential and possibilities. A possibility for transformation, an empty mind and heart may feel painful at the beginning but it serves as a fertile ground for personal growth and transformation. Neutral emptiness can also be seen as a temporary state or a way to transition towards a positive light, in this state, self-reflection, introspection and finding balance happens, it provides an opportunity for you to step back and observe what really is truly important in life, before we move forward towards positive emptiness.
Emptiness in a positive light, emptiness can be associated with a sense of liberation and freedom. Freedom from attachments, it allows for a sense of spaciousness and the possibility of exploring new perspectives and possibilities without being limited by preconceived notions and feelings. Embracing emptiness and treating them as new beginnings can be very helpful for individuals who have struggled maintaining an identity that they for so long held. With an empty vessel devoid of your old practices, habits and beliefs one can fill it with something new, something far better than what we ones held. Transcending old behavior and opening new possibilities for a wider horizon only adds to your knowledge and wisdom, it allows for a new exploration of what you might become as you leave behind your old self.
Vincent van Gogh
A painter who posthumously became world renowned and considered to be one of the most influential figures in the world of western arts has suffered complex feelings of loneliness and emptiness within. Although his life, career and creativity cannot only be attributed to his mental health struggles, it is important for us to consider that this is only a part of the whole aspect of his life. His brilliance is very apparent within his creativity, imagination and brush strokes. However, one would also say that the emptiness and suffering within him have helped create some of the most amazing artwork we have ever seen in our lifetime. This sounds very detached from any emotional capacity one person can have but there might be some truth within it.
Emptiness as an Irony
The irony that comes with emptiness lies in the fact that we spent years working towards our dreams, often with the expectation that achieving them would bring lasting satisfaction and fulfillment. However, upon reaching that point, some may realize that the emptiness and orderliness that come with accomplishment can evoke a sense of longing for the vibrant and dynamic aspects of their previous life, despite its challenges.
“As I write a part of this piece, I am currently surrounded by hundreds of people, I am seated in the middle of a busy food court, group of friends sat afront of me sharing what seems to be a bucket of French fry, to my right side a father of three feeding them with fried chicken and to my left an elderly couple sharing a piece of cake and a cup of coffee. My heart is heavy, my throat getting choked up, but my tears remain in the back of my eyeballs, I don’t want to cry. After years and years chasing my dreams, I gaze at a pristine emptiness and felt a longing for the chaos I once had in my life. I reflect a lot sometimes on how I dedicated most of my life pursuing things that are far less important than what I had sacrificed. I have accomplished quite a few feats in my life and some of those I no longer strive for. A lot has truly changed within me”. – Anonymous
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